How to make this the best school year ever
A few weeks ago, I spent a week with my grand dog Bogey: a lovable lab mix my son and his girlfriend rescued in March. He’s a sweet soul who’s learning to adjust to an ever-growing body.
The first few days were difficult, to say the least, because I haven’t had a big dog for a long time. I’ve always had little dogs who weighed less than 15 pounds and learning to manage Bogey took some time. I stressed every time we went for a walk. He’s strong-willed and wants to go a certain way and chew on all sorts of things. I felt I couldn’t control him and panicked when another dog crossed our paths. Some owners were friendly and allowed the sniffing and smelling to occur while others shielded their dog from him. Which meant I had to wrestle him in a direction he didn’t want to go. It was tiring and took a while to calm down after these adrenaline-filled walks. I knew someone had to change, and it most likely wouldn’t be Bogey.
Then I wondered what would happen if every walk was calming and relaxing? What would I have to do to feel calm and relaxed before, during, and after our walk? That was easy. I’d have to feel that way knowing that at any moment that plan would go straight to hell. It was worth a try at least, and the first time I silently repeated my intention to have a calm and relaxing walk. When another dog appeared, and he set his sights on it; I’d repeat my plan in my head. When he wanted to go in a different direction, I’d repeat my plan. It wasn’t perfect, yet I didn’t feel drained at the end of our walk.
The next day I said my plan out loud to Bogey and reminded him quite often that we were having a calm and relaxing walk when I felt the anxiety begin to rise. When he started pulling and walking too fast, we stopped, and I took a deep breath, or two, and reminded him of our plan. Of course, he still lunged at random people, and there were minefields full of other dogs and their skittish owners, but I felt calm and in control.
Life is a metaphor for everything you encounter
What are the minefields that hijack your calm and relaxing classroom? Who are the kids that lung at you and continuously need redirecting? How you respond to them makes all the difference. Restraining them with verbal cues won’t work. It’s the love and peace and calming energy that will.
You get to have the best school year ever. You get to have classes full of kids who are kind and respectful. You get to laugh and share with your students.
It all starts with you.
What scares the hell out of you?
What stories do you tell yourself about the students you hate?
How are you letting these stories control your thoughts and feelings?
What do you want and what are you willing to change to get it?
My story about Bogey was that he’s a big dog and I couldn’t manage him without brut force which was not valid. Once I realized his size intimidated me, I was able to decide how I wanted to feel when I walked him. I went from scared to calm and relaxed because that felt better, and the energy immediately transferred to him. Our environment didn’t change. There was still trash he wanted to eat, and dogs he tried to meet, but my plan never changed.
There may be challenging students and irritating parents, and there may not be. It’s all in how you look at these perceived obstacles and your game plan for overcoming them.
What’s your game plan?
How do you want to handle these situations? How do you want to feel before, during, and after a challenging situation? An intention is like a lesson plan. How do you want to feel during stressful situations? Once you have the feelings, you can repeat them, either aloud on in your head. You can even make it part of your discipline plan for the school year. Instead of berating your students for not following directions, you can remind them how you’re all a part of a kind and respectful classroom.
Then you get to model what that means. You get to talk kindly and respectfully to your students. You get to remind them to be respectful to their peers. Once they see it in action and feel the energy around it, you get to see kind and courteous students.
It’s all about creating the energy you want in your classroom, and you’re the only one who can do it. If it’s not a conscious creation, then the most dominant energy will prevail. It’s never too early or too late to change that. It just takes a whole lot of love and respect because your students will treat you; however, you treat them.
You get to help students learn to love themselves in a safe space, and for that, the world will be eternally grateful. It doesn’t have to be hard and stressful. It really can be calm and relaxing if you believe it can.
Sheryl